There’s another woman living in my closet.
She apparently wears size 8 shoes and a lot of pantyhose. If I tried to squeeze my size 8.5/9 feet into those shoes, it would look like the scene in Cinderella where the evil stepsisters try to make the glass slipper fit. Not pretty. As for pantyhose, ha! I can probably count the number of times I wear pantyhose in a given year on one hand.
And yet there are drawers and drawers of them in my closet — a rainbow of nudes, tans, whites, off-whites, off-blacks and jet-blacks. Mostly control tops, but a few thigh highs and knee highs. The sheer volume of sheer hosiery is awe-inspiring — who is this woman who requires such a selection of stockings?
Apparently a part of me that I left behind quite some time ago.
The old Corporate Me, pre-kids, pre-pregnancy-enlarged-feet. The one who wore pantyhose and size 8 shoes to her corporate job every day — seven years ago.
Every time I have an evening event to go to, I enter my closet, certain I have just the right satin pump or glimmery sandal, only to find, alas, not my shoes, but Hers. What a wonderful collection she has. Shoes in every color, of every heel height. Whereas recent years have mostly found me in sneakers, Crocs, casual sandals and flats.
I finally decided to kick her out of my closet. Yes, my shoe shelves will look extremely bare, but it will also help demonstrate quite visibly to JavaDad just why I need to go shoe shopping! Corporate Me’s well-kept shoe collection is being donated, hopefully somewhere out there is a mom who used to be a size 7.5 and went up to an 8 who will be delighted by the new bounty.
As for the pantyhose, it was only as I went through all those drawers that I remembered what I wrote in a “dream job” exercise nearly a decade ago — that I would like to find a career where I could always find new challenges, be outdoors and away from a desk more, and not have to wear pantyhose every day. I certainly wasn’t thinking of motherhood when I wrote that in my single days, but it fits the bill. I think I’ll pare down the hosiery collection to a more manageable size and perhaps this year’s tomato plants will look a little more colorful with a variety of stocking tie backs!
Soon I hope to also kick out that woman who wears clothing in sizes larger than I like. It’ll be a lot of fun to get rid of her clothes!
This post is an original DC Metro Moms Post. When she’s not rummaging through her closet, J.J. Newby aka JavaMom blogs about life, family, and anything that amuses her at Caffeine And A Prayer.