I have a confession. I’m terribly shy. Those who know me in person often laugh uproariously at this confession because “gregarious” is an adjective more likely to come up with my name, but I am an extrovert who is initially terribly, terribly shy. I find it almost painful to break into new crowds and meet new people. Once I’ve settled in with a group of people, I can easily become the life of the party, but initially, I feel like a wallflower (though I try to hide it).
When we moved into our neighborhood, we were blessed with extremely friendly neighbors on either side of us and across the street from us. People who helped dig out our driveway in our first snow storm, who invited us to their Christmas parties, who have watched our homes while we’ve been on vacations, and one neighbor even surprised us by mowing our lawn while I was in the hospital giving birth to JavaBoy. We aren’t really the same age, and their kids are much older, so we’re not living on a block where all the neighbors are having coffee at each other’s tables each morning, and yet everyone within stone’s throw of our front yard has been not only polite, but downright neighborly to us over the past several years.
I know very little about the neighbors directly behind me.
What I do know is that there is an annual block party every Fourth of July with a live band, fireworks you can see just above my roof, and what sounds like a lot of fun.
So finally, I decided to walk around the block to check the scene out. After nine years, I knew we were never going to be invited, but hey — what would it hurt to at least see what it was all about? My children are getting to the age where they were starting to want to know more about what was going on right behind us and I figured we might as well explore — a quick family walk was in order.
We walked over before things got dark, and found more kids than I’ve ever seen in the neighborhood in one place except at the elementary school or the pool. Families everywhere — this block party was a true blowout! And a few different families I knew — who apparently didn’t live on the cul de sac but knew people who did and come to this every year. When I explained that we lived just behind one of the houses and just walked over to see what everything was about, they invited us to stay and watch the fireworks. We explained we didn’t want to crash the party, just wanted to see what all went on since we could hear it every year and could see the fireworks. But so many people were so friendly and included our kids in the festivities and invited us to stay, that JavaDad ended up going back home to grab our chairs so we could enjoy the fireworks with everyone else.
I have no idea if I will ever get to know the neighbors behind us, but I’m proud of myself for removing the invisible barrier and walking around the block. I made a point to introduce myself and my family to people. At one point, when a harried mother was surrounded by kids while she was handing out small “pop-it” firecrackers she handed me a bag and asked if I’d help her and I was briefly a part of the scene, rather than an observer on the sidelines.
Sometimes it is not the lack of an invitation that is holding us back, but our own lack of initiative. Do you have a block you need to walk around?
Photo credit: istockphoto
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Good for you. We got to know more of our neighbors after a serious hurricane left the neighborhood without power for several weeks. We helped clear the street of debris, shared food and water, and kept each other company during the long hot days. And even now, more than 10 years later,those friendships endure.